In the end, only three things matter:
How much you loved,
How gently you lived,
How gracefully you let go of things not meant for you.
-Buddha
It is an early, dark, chilly, morning I find when I let Rosie out. The yard is blanketed in snow and there is a beautiful stillness except for a slight breeze stirring the wind chimes hanging in my maple tree. The gently falling snow is peaceful. Winter is a great time to reflect on the inner world of our consciousness and awareness. I can hear a few cars way off in the distance and a neighbor's furnace mildly groaning from across the street. In the hushed tones of the early morning, I began to ponder on the week that has just ended. I have been writing about forgiveness, but the words were not yet flowing. Can we learn to forgive and let go of things not meant for us as gently as the snow falls?
I say the words are not yet flowing because I cannot just sit down to write unless I feel inspired. The words will begin to flow after something has been ignited within. I have to feel deeply into what I am writing about until the words sing to me of truth and love. Will this writing on forgiveness be of service to self and others? Yes, that is my hope. We are co creators of our lives. I am writing about forgiveness and what do you know, a few comments were made to me this past week that started a swelling wave of thoughts that caused a bit of turbulence in my usually peaceful mind.
Old wounds can so easily be poked or prodded sometimes intentionally sometimes not. These wounds can especially be caused by family members or people who are close to us. The universe is saying to me, “You want to write about forgiveness? Well here’s another opportunity for you to be in your practice of forgiveness. Walk your walk sister. My practice continues to unfold.
Why is forgiveness so bloody hard?
Forgiveness is difficult because our egos get involved and they always want to be in charge. It is very easy to get a hold of a story in our minds. We ruminate about it. The details of what someone said or did to us or something we said or did to another. It is hard to let go. Emotions are energy in motion. Victim consciousness gets added to the story and we are really in it now. We hold onto stories because they hurt us or we hurt another. We don’t want to look like fools so we may want to retaliate or seek revenge. “Seek revenge and you should dig two graves, one for yourself.” (Confucius) I, myself, perfected the silent treatment towards people who offended me. It hurts us to be hurt. It also hurts us to hold onto those hurts.
Forgiveness is challenging because the wounded child inside of us wants to be heard. She wants to be acknowledged. She needs attention. She will continue to show up in your life until she is heard, healed and loved. The faces and circumstances that assist us in creating the turbulence in our minds may change, but the things that provoke us will continue to rise up until we listen to them. Honor them. Heal them and let them go with love and forgiveness.
It gets easier to forgive the more I practice. I continually have to ask myself the questions, “What do I need? What do I feel? What am I afraid to feel? How do I transform this hurt and forgive? When we have been hurt by family or toxic people sometimes we need distance between us to give us perspective. We can still forgive them and love them from a distance. But in the end, we are co creating these occurrences to help teach us the art of forgiveness. To feel is to heal. We will continue to mirror situations in our lives that need to be transformed until we transform them.
Forgiveness is the ability to rise above any situation. It is about coming to an understanding from your highest self and meeting and forgiving the other person from their highest self. I have been in sticky situations where the only thing I could do to find peace within was to forgive. It works. The power of forgiveness is real. It is right up there with the power of gratitude. Both powerfully healing. When we learn to bring them both into our daily existence and practice you will witness miraculous changes in your life.
Forgiveness is one of the most transformational and healing tools we have in our tool box. It not only frees up our mind, it's freeing to our bodies and our souls. We forgive others and we also must learn to forgive ourselves. Read that again. Forgive others as we forgive ourselves. We forgive everything no matter what it is. We forgive even that which is unforgivable. Send it back to the creator, the God of your own understanding to be transformed back into love.
When we forgive it doesn't mean we condone certain behaviors in others that have hurt us. The stories we gather that we keep replaying in our minds of what someone said to us that offended us. The terrible things that may have happened to us sometime in our life. You can feel it in your body when you hang onto emotions that we haven’t yet let go of. You know the ones that you carry around like armor. Your heart may feel heavy. You may get migraine headaches. Anger can sit in our livers and can turn it toxic. Your shoulders sag with the weight of the burdens, the hurts, and everything that is unresolved. The victim consciousness of all the stories we carry around that we believe define us. Let go of those beliefs. Notice there is the word "lie" right in the middle of belief and believe. They are not true.
Love is the highest vibration and everything less than love wants to rise up and be transformed back into love. What we forgive in ourselves we can forgive in all. The Law Of One. What is good for one is good for all. Where we can bring forgiveness, gratitude, peace and love it expands exponentially and multiplies outwards to all.
A meditation practice to literally go jump in the lake!
Take a few deep breaths in and exhale out. You are going to walk through a purple door. Step into the emerald green meadow of your heart. Beyond this gorgeous vibrant green meadow visualize a beautiful white sandy beach. Walk through the warm sand and there is a magnificent purple lake. Take hold of your wounded child's hand and run and jump into that purple lake. It is made of healing energy. Take a swim, do the dog paddle, splash, play, soak and heal in this beautiful, peaceful, clean, clear purple lake. Purple is the healing color of transformation. You can even visualize purple rain falling gently upon you and transforming you with every drop. (Thanks Prince.)
Allow this purple flowing energy to wash over and through every cell transforming all of your hurts with forgiveness. Clearing out all of the old, stagnant beliefs, feelings, stuck emotions, remembered slights, any and all physical and/or verbal offenses you have experienced in your life. Let it all go and forgive it. Forgive it all, even the things that are unforgivable. Send them back to the creator. Allow healing to come in and call back your joy. Release it all. Set it free.
Love is the highest vibration and everything less than love wants to rise up and be transformed back into love. What we forgive in ourselves we can forgive in all. What is good for one is good for all concerned. We are all one. Where we bring forgiveness it grows and expands outward. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.